I am afraid that with every trip around the sun I am becoming more and more prickly. It seems that lately I am much more easily annoyed by very benign issues. I am really trying to work on this.  Through the use of a combination of  red wine, Native American herbal bath salts, a daily (and very nude) yoga session on my roof as the sun rises, and a bunch of of old Deep Purple music I am attempting to not appear to be such a grouch all of the time.

Through this therapy (which I have called "Roedel's Enhanced Emotional Lobotomy ™" or R.E.E.L for short) I have made some serious inroads.  No longer do I refer to bicyclists who like to swerve back and forth while they ride in the middle of the road in front of my car as "Llama Humping Communists Who Shall Be Thrown Into A Pit Of Month Old Mayo™"  (or L.H.C.W.S.B.T.I.A.P.O.M.O.M for short)  I also have made such progress that no longer does the sound of a squeaky grade school orchestra make me feel as compelled to press charges against The Superintendent of Schools here in Laramie County. (Although my I am still holding fast with the civil suit I brought up against the school district in 2007 because of their out of tune city-wide Christmas program.  For some reason I am having trouble gaining traction in getting my case heard...but don't worry....justice is patient and so is my vengeance!)

I am really trying to be less of a snakry snark monster who acts like I constantly being offended by the casual affairs of the world.  I desperately do not want to turn into this man:



I thought I had made some strides forward in my ability to not let the world get me in a Roedel-man-tizzy. (or also know as a RoMazzy™ for short) but lately I have encountered a new annoyance that I am having a real problem being able to let slip by.  It is a phrase that I have seen started to crop up in text messages, tweets, and status updates on Facebook and it always invokes a class 9 RoMazzy™.  The saying bothers me as much as the video "My name is Luka" ever did.

The Phrase in question is:

"Nuff Said"

Oh for the sweet resting soul of Gary Coleman do I hate that saying.  I have been seeing it all over the place and it usually shows up in a text or a status update like this:

  I cannot stand the heat, it is going to drive me crazy!!  Nuff Said!!!!

 The Wyoming Cowboys better be ready to play this Saturday!  Nuff Said!

  If my boss tells me how to do my job again I am really going to freak out.  NUFF SAID!!!




Sigh.

First of all, when in the holy hell did anyone decide that the word "nuff" is acceptable to be used in conversation??  Nuff sounds like the name of an elf. Here is the only logical way I can imagine that the phrase "Nuff said" can be used without causing my organs to start to shut down:

        Nuff, the magical elf had a wonderful time picking berries outside the Crystal Castle. That was
        until his friend the unicorn showed up to tell him that the berries had been cursed by ROTFLMAO, 
        the evil wizard.  The elf was concerned. Nuff said "Oh my!"

That is it.  Otherwise using "Nuff Said" around me will force me to cringe like I just ate a tabasco infused ghost pepper.

Of course I will concede that the fact that I allow myself to become so upended by the use of the dreaded phrase says a lot more about me than it does about the person who utters it.  I should not let something so trite cause me to react so sharply.  I feel like a crotchety old man standing on his lawn in his plaid pants and white t-shirt yelling at the cars who are driving too fast in his neighborhood.  "Nuff Said" is sweeping across the world and it has quickly become part of our vernacular.  Rest assured that I have enough self-awareness to realize that I am standing against the tide on this one.  

I will also concede that there are obviously a lot of worse things that people could saying instead of "Nuff Said".  I certainly would rather see people use that phrase than dropping in a F-Bomb casually in social network conversations.  I would hate to see the following examples replace "Nuff Said":

   If my 3 year old daughter does not pick up her toys I am going to have to ground her.  Nuff Said!!  F*****!!!!!!

That is a much worse alternative than "Nuff Said".  I get that.  If using the saying is the only way to keep people from sounding like a sailor who is on shore leave than I am reluctantly all for it.  However, I don't think that is why people are using it.

It seems to me that "Nuff Said" is used to imply to the reader that the writer is finished with their thought.  It says to me that the the message has enough information in it already and that "enough has been said".  Hmmm.  Do you know what is an easier way to show the person reading it that the idea that is being communicated has come to an end???

A PERIOD!!!!!!  

It looks like this:   .

The use of "Nuff Said" is the equivalent to a trucker saying "over" at the end of their broadcast.  

     *Breaker 1-9. Hey there this is Smelly Pete, I gotta a Smokey riding low somewhere near the rickety bridge in Hazzard 
          County. Put that pedal to the medal and look out for Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane.  Over.   

*it should be noted that the only experience I have in how truckers actually talk to each other is from "Smokey and The Bandit" and "he Dukes of Hazzard"

If a person is actually done with what they have to say they should not feel compelled to add the qualifier "Nuff Said" to their message.  They don't need to let us know that there is nothing else coming.  We will figure that out when there is nothing else written after that!  There is no need to say "Nuff Said"...just stop freaking writing!!!  It will send the same message!!! By the way if people are in such a hurry that they don't even have enough time to spell the word "enough" and have to abbreviate it with "nuff" it seems to me that they are wasting their apparently valuable time writing extra words.

Using the phrase it kind of a cop out.  It gives someone too easy of an excuse to not feel like they should have to explain themselves to the person reading their message.  For example saying "nuff said" would not be enough for me to explain why you decided to put a live squirrel down your pants.  A lot of the time I need a lot more "nuff" to help me understand your point of view.  I wonder if I could get away with using this saying to get out of having to defend myself to someone...




********

John:  Sorry, Mr. IRS agent. I don't pay taxes.  Ever.  Nuff Said!!!

IRS Agent: Well, I was going to investigate you...but since you said "Nuff Said" I feel like you have answered all of my questions.  Have a nice day.  Would you like a mint?

*********

John: Your honor, it came as such a surprise to me when I discovered that my children were flammable. Nuff Said!!

Judge: Oooooooh.  The "Nuff Said" defense.  You are a combination of smart and sexy.  You are "Smexy" ™.  Charges dismissed.  Would you like a mint?

***********

John: The reason I came to see you doc is because on every full moon I shapeshift into an elk. Nuff Said!

Doctor: That is enough information for me to write you a prescription! You are sure handsome.  Have a mint!

**************

John:  Well God, who knew that my minivan can't jump over a group of nuns?  Weird.  Nuff Said!!!

GOD:  Indeed. 

John: So....

GOD:  Mint?

John:  I thought you'd never ask...

*************

   
"Nuff Said" is saying to the world that you don't  need to explain yourself  any further to me.  Which is true.  You don't have to explain anything to someone of my ilk.  Although when you don't give me any more explanation you force me to fill in the blanks with my own sick perspective.

For example if you were to say:

"My stinking neighbors better not crank their music again tonight or they are going to have to deal with me!  Nuff Said!!!!"  

I would be forced to translate that as:

"My neighbors better not crank their music again tonight or they are going to have to deal with me.  And by deal with me I mean I will wet my pants. A lot.  A whole lot."


or another example:

"This time my mechanic better figure out what is causing my car to make that strange knocking sound whenever I make a left turn. I am getting tired of him not doing his job!  Nuff Said!!!"

My mind would translate that as:

"This time my mechanic better figure out what is causing my car to make that strange knocking sound whenever I make a left turn. I am getting tired of him not doing his job! So if he does a poor job again I will have to add him to the list of my victims I have chopped into pieces and hid in my veggie garden.  You should feel free to call the police on me now and tell them that I am the "Compost Killer".

As you can see leaving the rest of the context to my imagination can, at best, lead to a misunderstanding...and at worst lead to your false inprisonment.

Besides for a yammer-mouth like myself the idea of enough ever being said seems counter to my nature. We as people leave too many words unsaid as it is.  Don't just tell me how you feel....tell me why you feel that way. 
 
Over and out.

This blog is over.

Don't feel like you need to read anymore.

I am finished.

Nuff Said!!!!